1. RELAX and GET ACQUAINTED
When at an on-premise club or swing house party, you
are there to have the best of times and to share the uninhibited enjoyment
associated with those who have discovered a new dimension in their
lifestyles. Once you have become familiar with the surroundings and staff
members or host/hostess, try to become as at ease as you would be at any
other social gathering. Don't hesitate to introduce yourselves to other
people. You'll find them eager to welcome you and to help you blend into
their circle of sincere camaraderie.
2. SOME TIPS ON ETIQUETTE
While you are advised to be congenial and outgoing,
don't be "pushy". Many couples who are new to "swinging" often have
unrealistic expectations and are not prepared to handle rejections that
may sometimes occur. Freshly showered, perfumed, and neatly dressed people
make more contacts. Don't let your personal physical idiosyncrasies stop
you from having a good time. No one is perfect [although it is common for
new "swingers" to see others as more attractive or more verbal as
themselves]. Don't let your own mind be your worst enemy. Be prepared to
handle rejection but don't take it personally.
It is important to remember that PERSONAL CHOICE is
the right of every individual and to 'respect that right' is only common
courtesy. Learn how to accept "no thank you" graciously. Your approach --
which should be the same as it would be at any social setting -- is a key
factor to your acceptance as a desirable partner/friend.
There are several variations to "swinging" and it is
important that you and your mate decide, in advance, those which you like
and dislike. Some couples prefer to be alone, while others prefer to be
with other couples. Establish your own ground rules, but please decide on
them BEFORE you start "swinging".
3. JOIN THE CONVERSATION
Some people will probably "break the ice" by
introducing themselves, along with other couples they know. It's their way
of making you feel at home. Feel free to join their conversation and
you'll find that most of them will be happy to answer any questions you
may have about the "swinging" lifestyle. Be open and honest. Tell them
that you are new to "swinging" and you'll discover how helpful people can
be.
4. START OFF ON THE RIGHT FOOT
On your first venture into the swinging scene, you may
feel somewhat uneasy about seeing your mate with someone else. Some
"swingers" want to share swinging with their mate and feel uneasy having
their mate leave to another room with someone. Everyone has their own
reasons for their feelings and all feelings are real and should be
respected. To avoid embarrassment or disillusionment, discuss your
inhibitions with your mate beforehand. Both of you may be more comfortable
after talking to other couples and learning how they handled their first
"swinging" session.
